The Child wants her to take care of him.
The Child sees her as a way to feel better about himself.
The Child just wants to “be himself” even if it hurts her.
The Child wants to “get” things from her.
The Child views being right as more important than creating love.
The Child feels like a victim when she is angry with him.
The Child looks at her parts, but can’t see her whole.
The Child tries to make her what he wants her to be.
The Child abdicates his power and doesn’t stand up for her.
The Child uses her.
The Child gets defensive when she brings her truth.
The Child is waiting for love to come to him. He seeks love outside of himself.
The Child doesn’t lead. He follows, and then is angry when he feels controlled.
The Child doesn’t want to wait. He wants what he wants from her NOW.
The Child wants to get away as soon as she is really there with him.
The Child cares more about how he is seen by others than really being present with her.
The Child is not able to be honest with himself, and she knows it.
The Child is selfish – and that is normal for children. But a child can’t hold a woman.
As men we all have our “Child Parts.” We need to get to know these parts and heal them so we can grow beyond the desires of the Child...
...and discover the desires of a Man.
We have wounding that inhibits our growth. We are caught in the past, compulsively trying to redeem our past failures, embarrassments, traumas, and insults.
Women suffer because of this.
We usually don’t even know we are doing it.
But we are. Unconsciously, and often.
Only a grown man can truly hold, protect, and love a woman.
And we all have parts of us that make us lose our ground and get taken over by the Child inside, still reeling from the wounds that hurt us so badly that we want to forget.
When we try to forget, we project our wounds tenfold onto the world, and especially onto the women in our lives.
This causes harm.
Sometimes it is obvious. Many times it is not.
But it is real.
And we ALL do it.
We have the trauma of the past in our DNA, passed down epigenetically through our lineage. This runs back tens of thousands of years.
We have to own that. We have to learn how we unconsciously cause harm.
It isn’t our fault. But it is our responsibility.
We owe it to the women in our lives and to our children. We owe it to other men, especially younger men who look up to us as examples.
We can do the work that heals ourselves, the women in our lives, our lineage, and the world.
You may not even be aware of it, but...
Your deepest masculine desire is to simply witness her beauty.
You want to see her flourish in all her glory.
You yearn to lead her to surrender into rapture and bliss.
You desire to feel the depths of her heart in all its truth.
You want to learn from her oracle.
You love to protect her.
You work your body and mind to become the strongest vessel possible - for her.
You enjoy holding space.
You ARE love. You bring love in every moment. You don’t need to wait for love to come to you.
You long to create the conditions for the MOST love.
You want to go to bed every night knowing you gave your ALL for her, the people you love, and the world.
You yearn to RE-MEMBER the blissful union with her that is your home, your most natural state.
There is only one way to actualize these desires:
Commit to the path of Self-Mastery and Initiation.
Know yourself.
Own your wounds and unhealthy patterns.
Accept the task of healing yourself and your lineage.
Sound challenging?
Welcome to manhood.
This is not just a burden.
It is the single most meaningful and nourishing undertaking of your life.
The Winter Solstice is a time of renewal, a time to plant seeds for the future.
There is no better time to shed the old and move into the new.
There is no better time for men to join the ranks of other like-minded masculine beings on this journey of Self-Mastery and Initiation.
On Monday, December 22nd, I’ll be leading a special call with the amazing Kate Joyner, founder of Dancing Serpent.
We’ll be leading a powerful Solstice embodiment practice on Zoom to usher in the new season, to help men and women remember their divine inheritance of natural and blissful union with one another.
Men will have an opportunity to fulfill their masculine roles as holders of space, committing to a path of healing that will fulfill their truest masculine desires.
Details:
Date: Monday, December 22nd, 2025
Time: 2:00-3:30pm EST
Place: Zoom (link will be delivered when you sign up)
To sign up:
We hope you'll join us at this auspicious time for growth, renewal, and healing.
Masterfully yours,
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